Wednesday, December 19, 2012

On the Edge of Desire

While playing Skyrim I asked a question in order in gain enternce into an old Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary. The door asked, "What is life's greatest illusion?" The correct answer was "innocence", but out of the rest of the choices,

But one of the other answers struck with me. It read: "Dreams are reality, and reality is really a dream."

This got me thinking a lot, because for the last few months I have been sleeping in, as late as 5 in the afternoon sometimes. I know it's partly because I don't have a job, but I belive it's mostly because I am so obsorbed in my dreams.

What if my dreams are really reality and the waking life I have been living is really just a dream?

This just rises too many questions.. Yet I feel that I am on the verge of discoverying something grand. I feel that I am on the edge of Desire.

Why I Write


Why do I write?

I write because, writing is an essential part of my life. It is my passion, an uncontrollable addiction, an endless love affair, a weakness, a strength, a chronicle of dreams, a reason for living. Writing for me is living in dreamland while everyone else merely exist in reality.

I write because, for once, no one can tell me what to do. I am the god of my work and even if it is just briefly each day that I hold onto that power, no one can take it away from me. I can do anything, say anything, and create anything in my writing. The possibilities are as endless as my imagination. I write to constantly explore just how far my imagination can go.

I write so I never have to wonder where my head is at. If I didn’t record my thoughts and feelings, than I would mostly likely overload my mind and explode because I have too much going on up there. With the words written down or typed up, I can go back, read and know just what state of mind or mood I was in on any given day.

I write to keep from going insane from the day-to-day mediocre life. In society, I don’t fit in much, but in my writing I can explore places and worlds beyond this one. What else can I do to focus all of these emotions, feelings, and ideas? For me writing is like a therapeutic exercise for my mental wellbeing.

I write to not only give purpose to my life, but to give purpose to writing itself. It is my duty as a writer to invent the next “big” monster, to stray away from the “already been done”, to rekindle originality, to not except bland, mundane things. “Fresh, exciting and unique” are my mission. And into the great beyond is my destination.

I write because I believe it is why I was born. To be as dramatic as possible, I was born to tell stories and share with the world the wonders of my imagination. I write to say that I have something worthwhile to share, and to preserve.